I have been on an amazing journey over the past few days, well, since the beginning of the new year, really. I am always hungry for more of God and seek to learn more from Him about myself and who I am in Him. Well, what is happening in my heart is simply supernatural. It reminds me of when I first got saved. I feel like God is taking me from Glory to Glory and from strength to strenth in who I am IN HIM.
This morning in particular, as I came downstairs to greet the family and join them for waffles, out of nowhere I had this sense of understanding deep in my heart and mind that I am accepted. I keep hearing in my spirit "I am accepted." I am accepted in Christ and through Christ. I don't need to do one single thing to be accepted. I don't need to prove myself. I don't need to prove myself... to anyone. God showed me that I am to just walk at peace with myself knowing that my heart is right and my heart is so full of love and peace that I don't need to worry about whether or not people see that.
I tend to worry and obsess about what other people think of me... did I call them enough, did I leave anyone out, was I sweet enough, did I offend that person because I gave them a half smile and not a giant one... UGH! I constantly feel like I need to defend myself and over explain myself and make sure that I am not hurting anyone's feelings. The truth is that I am 99.9% of the time the furthest thing from their minds. I tease that I care too much and I think too much and worry too much. I think I would rather ere on this side of the fence than the other. There is a saying that "It is better to love and be hurt than to not love at all." So, even though I wear myself out worrying, I will never stop seeking to show more and more love, but in the Bible, Jesus told us that His yoke is easy and His burden is light... Help me Lord to show your love and serve others by YOUR strength and not my own and by your leading and not by my worrying.
An apple pie is an apple pie. It does not need to tell everyone it is an apple pie or explain that it is an apple pie or defend itself or even TRY to "be" an apple pie... it just... IS. So, as the apple pie "is", so am I... I just AM... in Christ and accepted. :o) (I used the apple pie as an example because I just ate some... hehe).
Lord, I pray that you help me to be more concious of who YOU are in me. Help me to allow you to flow through me in YOUR own way, not in my way or the way I think you would want to flow. Help me to know that YOU ALONE are Saviour and YOU ALONE are God!
